Why is it difficult to get 50/50 custody in divorce?
Posted December 30th, 2022.
Categories: Child Custody.
Read on to learn more about why it can be challenging to secure 50/50 custody of your child in New Jersey.
Read MorePunish the real violators financially — with hourly sanctions.
Posted January 4th, 2017.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
What can you do when a parent openly violates court orders, refusing to return the child on time, or otherwise failing to abide by the parenting time plan? What can you do when one of the parties ignores the threat of having a motion filed against him? He thinks: If you file a motion against […]
Read MoreBribe the kids with Oreos….well, not exactly.
Posted January 2nd, 2017.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Happy New Year! Now that we’re off to a fresh start, think about putting the kids to work at the supermarket. When you go grocery shopping, assign your children to specific tasks. For example, ask your daughter to take control of all paper products — napkins, paper towels, tissues, toilet paper, paper plates. Ask your […]
Read MoreMake a New Year’s Eve Time Capsule with the kids. It may provide valuable insight
Posted December 30th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
As the year 2016 draws to a close, think about what significant events have occurred throughout the year — in your life, your children’s lives, and in the state of your family. Get the kids of creating a “time capsule.” A time capsule can be made from an empty tennis ball container or similar type […]
Read MoreNew Year’s Resolutions for Kids — Get them started now!
Posted December 28th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Now is a good time to get your children started on making their New Year’s Resolutions. Of course, many of us adults tend to make the same resolutions every year — lose weight, work less, finish that class, clean out that spare room — and we promptly break them by mid-January. But children may treat […]
Read MoreIf you have the kids on New Year’s Eve, plan a kids party at your house or attend one somewhere else.
Posted December 26th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Parents often fight so aggressively over who has the children for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day that they forget the value of having the children on New Year’s Eve or New Year’s Day. If you have the children on New Year’s Eve this year, get them involved early in planning a New Year’s Eve party. […]
Read MoreUse Christmas as an opportunity to teach good manners.
Posted December 23rd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! If you’re having a family gathering for the holidays, be sure that the children have have received a crash course in guest etiquette. Make sure they know their table manners. If somebody gives them a lousy gift — or perhaps a toy or a book they already have — teach […]
Read MoreGet the kids involved in making holiday gifts at your home — a custody strategy, not just a nice gesture.
Posted December 22nd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Take advantage of the upcoming holidays, and get your kids busy making gifts. Not just buying gifts…but rather, making them. Get the children invested in the holiday spirit by turning their rooms into Santa’s workshop. Producing gifts at your home is much more than generating holiday cheer. It’s a strategy to strengthen the children’s ties […]
Read MoreCoordinate gift-giving with the other parent, and don’t leave half-siblings out of the picture
Posted December 21st, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
One of the valuable lessons of the holiday season is the virtue of gift-giving. Children should learn about the pleasures of giving holiday cards and gifts to their loved ones. This important seasonal ritual can get lost (or confused) when kids are divided between two households, or when they have half-brothers and half-sisters at one […]
Read MoreDon’t buy holiday gifts for your kids that will complicate your custody case.
Posted December 20th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Shopping for the kids? Be careful. If you’re embroiled in an ongoing child custody dispute, holiday gifts can be a source of great confusion and tactical warfare. Consider, for example, the non-custodial parent who buys a new bicycle for his son. The gift is given to the boy when he visits with his father on […]
Read More“You’re Grounded!” How to Collaborate in Punishing Your Children
Posted December 19th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Imagine this situation: Suzy, a 14-year-old, stays out with her friends well beyond the local town curfew. She is escorted home at 2:00 a.m. by a local police officer. She is drunk. Her mother, the custodial parent, is infuriated. “You’re grounded, young lady,” she declares. And she means it! Except for one problem…. The next […]
Read MoreGive the Non-Custodial Parent a Freebie
Posted December 16th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Often, a child custody case is so contentious that parents fight over every little detail. So this piece of advice may seem contrary to common practice. But trust me on this one: It’s not a bad idea, every once in a while, if the parent with primary physical custody of the child (the custodial parent) […]
Read MoreGoing out of town with the kids for the holidays? Think “Exhibit” while you’re away.
Posted December 15th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Planning to travel out of town for the holidays? If so, don’t pass up the opportunity to gather some useful evidence along the way. If you’re embroiled in a child custody fight, an out-of-town trip with the kids is a prime chance to collect “exhibits” that can be used in your case. For example, if […]
Read MoreGet to Bed! Why you must unify children’s bedtimes and curfews.
Posted December 14th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
A lesson to be learned: Back in 1991, Donna Forner and Bradley Gabriel of North Carolina had a child together. Ms. Forner and Mr. Gabriel were never married, and by the end of the 1990s, they were fighting over child custody and support. The court initially awarded primary physical custody to Ms. Forner because she […]
Read MoreArrange sleepovers and play dates at your house.
Posted December 12th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
In a child custody dispute, it is always useful to draw as many of your children’s friends and parents as possible to your house. When it comes time to throw a party, do it at your house. Schedule sleepovers and playdates at your home, under your roof. Let other children in your neighborhood become familiar […]
Read MoreKeep records and receipts of all extraordinary purchases
Posted December 9th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Divorce, Family Law.
How many times have you heard a non-custodial parent try to slither out of paying child support by claiming he bought the children a new pair of sneakers or he paid for their soccer uniforms? Such special purchases are not the same as child support, and you can’t get credit for giving gifts or paying […]
Read MoreMake a home video with the kids, especially during the holiday season.
Posted December 8th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Take advantage of the many family gatherings and festive moments over the next five weeks to produce your own family home video. Give your children starring roles in the movie, featuring them in happy, silly moments in the presence of their grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. Catch them setting the table and helping with the […]
Read MoreGo on vacation with your kids’ half-siblings.
Posted December 7th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Relationships between siblings– even half brothers and half sisters– can be very important in a custody case. In fact, in many cases, a judge will decide the custody case in favor of the parent who best promotes the sibling relationship. Where half brothers and half sisters are bonded to each other, the parent who can […]
Read MoreLet the spirit guide you! Why church membership might help your custody case.
Posted December 5th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Getting Godly doesn’t usually affect the results of a child custody case, but occasionally religious faith can have a positive influence. As courts strive to determine what’s in the best interest of the children, they find themselves looking at a number of factors – the best educational interest, the best social and cultural interests, the […]
Read MoreBuy your child a book today!
Posted December 2nd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
The art of reading is slipping away quickly these days as children grow up in a world of I-Pads, I-Pods, Androids, Kindles and other messaging and texting devices. Too often, the courts hear about children who are failing basic reading and writing tests and who are emerging from high school as functional illiterates. For this […]
Read MoreMeet the Neighbors — Not your neighbors, Your ex’s neighbors.
Posted November 30th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
You might be surprised to learn how many family secrets are shared by the neighbors. Not just your neighbors, but your ex-wife’s or ex-husband’s neighbors. If you and the other parent of your children live more than a few blocks away from each other, you’re not likely to know his or her neighbors very well. […]
Read MoreIntroduce yourself to school coaches and activity leaders, and score a homerun in court!
Posted November 28th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Nick Jones plays football on the varsity team at school. He hangs out with his teammates. He wears his football jersey day and night and has all the telltale signs of a school jock. Nick’s mother has primary physical custody of Nick and has been his main caregiver since the divorce five years ago. Both […]
Read MoreYou’re in trouble if you don’t know your child’s favorite color, favorite song, and favorite ice cream flavor
Posted November 25th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
It may sound trivial, but you should interview your children to find out their personal preferences – about everything. What’s their favorite color? Their lucky number? Their favorite television show? Musical performer? Their favorite article of clothing? Their favorite car? If you don’t know the answers to these kinds of questions, you’re vulnerable to attack […]
Read MoreConduct a child safety audit before taking your custody case to court.
Posted November 23rd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Devin, Hunter and Emilio were three boys living in Michigan who caught the attention of public authorities because of their unsafe living conditions. Back in 2007, when authorities investigated the living arrangements, they found that the boys’ mother had been a victim of domestic violence when the children were present. Emilio, an infant, did not […]
Read MoreSend holiday cards to potential witnesses and invite them over for Thanksgiving and Christmas
Posted November 22nd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
The holiday season is an opportunity for parents involved in custody cases to cultivate goodwill among potential witnesses. If you’re involved in a custody case or one is looming on the horizon, think about who you might call as witnesses. Who can provide useful testimony? Who can recount favorable experiences in which you exhibited admirable […]
Read MoreMother Nature and the Family Court: Why Local Parks Might Help Your Custody Case.
Posted November 21st, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
We’ve been blogging about schools, crime rates, and other ways to compare one neighborhood with another. In judging what’s in the best interest of a child in a custody case, a judge is often required to compare the mother’s home and community environment with the father’s. Another consideration is the access to parks and recreational […]
Read MoreCrime Pays…At least knowledge about crime pays off in a child custody case.
Posted November 18th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Let’s say you’re the non-custodial parent. The custodial parent wants to move with the child from her safe, quiet suburban town to the nearest big city, in order to be closer to her job. She claims that by cutting down on the daily commute from the suburbs, she can provide better care to the child […]
Read MoreMy school’s better than your school! Why this might matter in your custody case.
Posted November 16th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Mom lives in a great school district. The children enjoy top-notch teachers, health-conscious lunch menus and a full array of inter-scholastic sports and clubs. The school “resource center” has a team of highly trained after-school tutors to help children with computer skills and test preparation. The school band, the choir, and the cheerleader squad are […]
Read MoreDo you have any idea what they’re really teaching your kids at school?
Posted November 14th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
You should familiarize yourself with the curriculum at your child’s school if you want to gain an edge in your child custody dispute. Of course, this is good parenting advice in general. But learning what your kids are learning in the classroom can bolster your chances of success in the Family Court too….as long as […]
Read MoreCreate a pdf directory of your child’s key documents
Posted November 11th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
It is best to do things systematically, since we are only human, and disorder is our own worst enemy. —Hesiod (800 BC) Do you have all of your child’s medical records catalogued and indexed? How about report cards and school progress reports? Are they all organized? Can you document, on a moment’s notice, who took […]
Read MoreMaintain a spreadsheet showing dates and amounts of child support paid or received
Posted November 9th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Child Support, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Officially, a custodial parent cannot bar a non-custodial parent from enjoying joint custody or visitation rights because of his failure to pay child support. Nor can a non-custodial parent refuse to pay child support because the non-custodial parent habitually interferes with his right of visitation. Still, the amount of support paid, and the frequency and […]
Read MoreName your children as beneficiaries on your life insurance policies.
Posted November 7th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
When was the last time you checked the designated beneficiary on your life insurance policy? Have you named your children as beneficiaries in the event of your untimely death? Parents who separate or divorce often forget to update their life insurance policies. If this is the case, you should remove your former spouse (or other […]
Read MoreAsk Your Child to Itemize the Pros and Cons of Your Household.
Posted November 6th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Here’s an eye-opener: Give your kids a pencil and a piece of paper and ask them to list all of the pros and cons of living (or staying) at your house. Regardless of whether you’re the custodial parent or the non-custodial parent, kids are likely to have some opinions about your home, your yard, your […]
Read MoreGive timely notice of summer vacation schedule with the kids.
Posted November 5th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
If you’re taking the children on a summer vacation, give the other parent early notice of your vacation plans. Provide the dates of travel, the itinerary and accurate contact information at least two months in advance. Whether you’re the custodial parent or the non-custodial parent, sharing this information on a prompt and timely basis – […]
Read MoreAvoid surprise drivers by making early introductions
Posted November 4th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Once two parents split up and start shuffling the children between two homes, there is always the risk that the parent responsible to pick up or return the children will have a scheduling conflict. Occasionally, it becomes necessary to have another person carry out the transportation responsibilities. But this is often the source of many […]
Read MoreBefriending your babysitter may benefit your case.
Posted November 3rd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Chances are, your children’s babysitter knows a few things you don’t know about the children. She may know that your daughter has a crush on a boy at school; she may know that your son got into a fight with a neighborhood bully; she may know why the kids dislike court-ordered visitations with your ex-spouse. […]
Read MoreDo you want your kids or don’t you? Speak up early and file your proposal promptly with the court.
Posted November 2nd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Many states have a procedure and a deadline for stating your position with respect to custody and visitation rights. For example, under New Jersey law, a parent who wants custody or other rights to the children must file a written “Custody and Visitation Plan” within 75 days after the last pleading is filed with the […]
Read MoreDo not withdraw restraining orders when custody is at issue. (Domestic Violence and Child Custody – Part 2).
Posted November 1st, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Domestic Violence, Family Law.
Yesterday, I blogged about the importance of securing a domestic violence protection order or restraining order if you’re a legitimate victim of domestic violence. Not just because you may need one to ensure your safety, and not just because judges often issue temporary custody orders as well. I recommended that you secure the domestic violence […]
Read MoreWhen violence strikes, don’t give love a second chance. A restraining order will help your custody case.
Posted October 31st, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Domestic Violence, Family Law.
Long before couples get divorced or find themselves in child custody cases, they may have fights that turn violent. Domestic violence is, of course, a serious matter, and the family courts around the country are prepared to issue restraining orders and temporary custody orders to deal with violent persons and their victims. But just as […]
Read MoreBack to school before back to court: Take a class with your child and gain an advantage in your custody case.
Posted October 30th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
An excellent way to improve your stake in a child custody case is to take a class with your child. Sign up for a cooking class with your teen. Or sign up for karate together. Enroll in a summer basketball camp – both of you – and complete the program together. Join an art club […]
Read MoreWhisper, Whisper, Not a Good Idea. Avoid discussing the other parent in the presence of the child.
Posted October 29th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Can you believe that Mr. Creepo wants full custody now? You won’t believe what that &$!#!! told the judge about me? Guess what that loser-ex-wife of mine is offering me in visitation time? When the heat of a child custody battle rises to the surface, parents tend to talk openly about each other. In fact, […]
Read MoreShare children’s grades and unify system of rewards and punishments
Posted October 28th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Do you know your child’s grades in reading, mathematics and other subjects? Does your ex-spouse know? If you’re not aware of your child’s current level of scholastic achievement, or if you’re not sharing information with another parent, you may be harming your chances for custody and/or visitation rights. Ask the mother in McCoy vs. McCoy, […]
Read MoreEat up! Feed your kids well right before they go to visit your ex.
Posted October 27th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
It’s not uncommon for one parent to feed the children better than the other. When custody is divided between two households, the kids tend to eat better, and more nutritionally, at one home than the other. In the best of all worlds, both parents would be healthy eaters who would pass on wholesome, low-fat, nutritional […]
Read MoreDon’t allow tattoos, piercings or blue hair on your children without the other parent’s consent
Posted October 26th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Has this happened in your family? Your child leaves your home on a Friday for an ordinary visit with your ex-spouse and comes back on Sunday looking like a monster. Without your knowledge or consent, your child suddenly has an enormous tattoo on her chest, or your seven-year-old son has a nose ring. Or worse […]
Read MoreNever monitor or record phone calls with the other parent
Posted October 25th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Tell me if this has happened in your home. The kids are with their other parent and you’re on the telephone talking to them, and you can hear in the background that the other parent is listening in, or coaching the children what to say. Bad news! Don’t let the other parent participate in your […]
Read MoreAn apple a day keeps the custody judge away: How healthy eating habits for your kids will improve your custody case
Posted October 24th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Do you really need somebody to tell you these days not to feed your kids high calorie, high-fat foods? I’m sure you know the highs and lows: Keep your kids high (in fiber) and low (in fat), and give them snacks and meals that provide calcium, iron, and other important vitamins and minerals. What many […]
Read MoreYou don’t want custody of your kids. What you really want is….
Posted October 23rd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
…parenting time. Or perhaps parental access, or maybe shared parenting rights. Depending on what state you live in, you might have noticed recently that many courts have stopped using the words “custody” and “visitation.” Instead, they’re now using more neutral terms such as “parenting time” or “shared parental responsibility.” Why? For many years, the award […]
Read MoreNever miss your time with the kids….without rescheduling.
Posted October 22nd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Let’s face it. Things happen, and sometimes you cannot keep your scheduled visit with the kids. Or if you’re the custodial parent, sometimes an emergency requires you to give up your time with the kids for a few hours or a day. Sudden developments at work, family issues, perhaps even your own illness – all […]
Read MoreKeep tabs on cancellations; they may provide powerful ammunition in custody court
Posted October 21st, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Are your children often dejected and dismayed because the other parent continuously misses scheduled visitations? Are you dealing with an absentee father or a missing mother? If your situation involves a parent who gets a joint custody or visitation order and then ignores his or her own rights, then you need to maintain very careful […]
Read MoreDon’t coach your child in preparation for the interview by the judge
Posted October 20th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Here’s a funny story. Or maybe it’s no so funny. We were representing a father who wanted custody of his daughters. The mother adamantly objected to a change in custody. For a year, the children had been shuttling back and forth between the parents’ homes, and it was time to pick a primary residence in […]
Read MoreGetting a dog or a cat could take a bite out of your adversary’s custody case
Posted October 19th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Do you have a dog at home? A cat? And how do your kids relate to these lovable pets? Judges don’t like to take children away from their pets. Having a pet as part of the family can help your claim for custody on many levels: First, it paints the picture of a full family, […]
Read MoreMake sure your children’s ID cards match your address
Posted October 18th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
It sounds like a routine administrative task, but it could have important consequences in a custody case: Make sure your children’s identification cards and registration records reflect your home address. Especially where the child has been moving between one parent and another, or where the family has moved recently as a whole, it is important […]
Read MoreShare your court orders with school officials and camp counselors.
Posted October 17th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
A court order is more powerful if you put it in the hands of teachers, coaches and camp counselors. Not every custody order needs to be passed around, but it may be a good idea – depending on the nature of your case – to circulate copies of your court orders among the authorities and […]
Read MoreBe kind to mother nature, and she’ll let you keep your kids.
Posted October 16th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
We live at a time when the world is very concerned about environmental health and safety. Every day, we read about oil spills, global warming, nuclear energy, endangered species and pandemics. Because these are such pressing issues, they are also well-known to the courts. They should also be known to your children as well. Kids […]
Read MoreDesign a social flowchart for each of your children.
Posted October 15th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Quick, in two minutes, can you name each of your children’s friends and schoolmates, their parents’ names, and each of the activities through which the friendships were forged? If not, you should draw a social flowchart. A social flowchart is essentially a family tree for friends. It connects your child to each of his friends, […]
Read MoreWhy join the Y? Score a few points by signing your kids up for the Y, the Little League or the Scout Troop.
Posted October 14th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
What organizations do your children belong to, outside of school? If your community sponsors its own recreational programs, think about signing up. If not, think about signing up for programs at the local YMCA or sister organizations. The same goes for joining the Little League or the locally sponsored Boy Scouts, Cub Scouts, Girl Scouts […]
Read MoreDon’t let children use Facebook as a platform for venting or gossiping about the family.
Posted October 13th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
It should come as no surprise to anyone these days, but careless comments on Facebook can get you in trouble. The same goes for your kids who may be using social media sites to vent about their frustrations with parents or to gossip about family members. There’s no practical way to kick your kids off […]
Read MoreDon’t send your child to your ex looking like Oliver Twist.
Posted October 12th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Here’s a story that I hear at least five times a year: “My ex-wife dropped the kids off to spend the weekend with me, and they were dressed in tattered jeans and raggedy shirts, and they looked like a pair of poor orphans.” Or, “my carefree ex-husband returned the kids in ripped pants and stained […]
Read MoreAward points for good behavior; take them away for misbehavior.
Posted October 11th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Some families operate like a well-oiled machine, each member taking responsibility for his or her space and working together as a team. Parents are often lucky to have courteous children who clean up after themselves, maintain the household, and follow sanitary bathroom etiquette. In other families, however, the kids seem to reject the rules. Perhaps […]
Read MoreConduct a Fire Safety Audit at your home
Posted October 10th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
When was the last time you inspected your chimney or wood stove? Do your kerosene heaters meet building safety codes? Do your kids know the rules regarding electric outlets, plugs and switches? If you haven’t thought about these things for awhile, it’s time for a household fire safety audit. Conduct a thorough investigation of all […]
Read MoreBefore you kiss your new partner, look over your shoulder…the kids may be watching you.
Posted October 9th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
After a divorce, it’s natural for parents to enter the dating scene again. In fact, a new relationship may have formed long before the divorce became final. Not uncommonly these days, separated parents begin living with new partners or at least openly dating them – before the bonds of matrimony are dissolved on the first […]
Read MoreIt’s not the “amount” of time you spend, it’s the way you spend it with the children.
Posted October 8th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Meet Jack. He’s the father of two boys. Since the date of divorce, he has filed 12 motions in Family Court to increase his parenting time. As Jack sees it, there will be no justice in this world until he has custody of his sons at least 50 percent of the time. For Jack, joint […]
Read MorePhotograph the extended family with the children, but avoid the posed pictures.
Posted October 7th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Many families embroiled in a child custody case like to supply their lawyers with photos of the children in the company of the extended family. Happy shots of the children and their grandparents, stepbrothers, and cousins may make a favorable impression, but they are not always admissible or relevant, and they are not always particularly […]
Read MoreArbitrate. Don’t Litigate. How to Keep the Judge Out of the Picture.
Posted October 6th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
We’ve all heard about mediation, but what about arbitration? In mediation, the parents try to settle their custody dispute in the presence of a third party who is usually a lawyer or other specialist serving as a court-appointed mediator. The mediator literally sits on the median – in the middle – trying to nudge the […]
Read MoreBe Patriotic – Follow the Children’s Bill of Rights.
Posted October 5th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
It may not be a constitutional Bill of Rights, but many courts are now following a Children’s Bill of Rights. A Children’s Bill of Rights is a list of the kinds of things that all good parents should provide for their children. For example, children have the right not to be dragged into the middle […]
Read MoreGet to know your babysitters and keep them happy
Posted October 4th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
How well do you know your babysitter? If you hire non-family members to watch your children when you’re not available, be sure to interview them in detail. Once you’re confident that your babysitter is competent and safe for your children, think about ways to improve your relationship with the sitter. For example, do you know […]
Read MoreDo not unnecessarily request paternity testing.
Posted October 3rd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
It sometimes seems like a smart idea to deny paternity. Especially in new child custody cases, it is not uncommon for the father to deny that he fathered the children, or for the mother to assert that the alleged father is not the biological father of the children. Often, however, it seems that these paternity […]
Read MoreStudy the school calendar for those unexpected days-off.
Posted October 2nd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Non-custodial parents can often upgrade their visitation schedule by scrutinizing the children’s school calendar at the beginning of the school. In fact, by this time of year, most school districts around the country have posted their revised calendars online. To the surprise of many parents, school districts often schedule days off (or in-service days or […]
Read MoreDisplay your children’s accomplishments at your home
Posted October 1st, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
It may seem rather commonplace to decorate your refrigerator with drawings by your children and copies of their classroom accomplishments, but don’t stop there. Feel free to publish your children’s artistic and literary works throughout the house. A excellent report card might deserve a frame and a place on the child’s dresser. The essay or […]
Read MoreNo reason to drop your kids off in East Jabip. Midpoint dropoffs make no sense.
Posted September 30th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
I don’t know why this is, but many parents involved in custody and visitation plans like to meet halfway between their homes for the dropoff or pickup of the children. They meet at convenience stores, shopping centers, rest stops on the highway and even police stations to deliver the children. Don’t do this! Midpoint dropoffs […]
Read MoreCompare schools before you announce plans to relocate
Posted September 29th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
One of the fatal flaws parents make in a custody case is to announce suddenly that they wish to relocate with the children to another state. A “For Sale” sign goes up in the front yard, and the non-custodial parent is caught off-guard. Within days, there’s an emergency motion in court, trying to prevent the […]
Read MoreGive immediate notice to other parent of children’s hospital visits and other emergencies.
Posted September 28th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Tell me if you’ve experienced anything like this: A parent takes a child on an outing at a local amusement park. While there, the child falls and suffers a severe laceration of his leg. The child is rushed to the hospital, where the parent spends six hours with him, as emergency room physicians and orthopedists […]
Read MoreDoes your house pass the household checklist?
Posted September 26th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
If I were to walk into your house, taking notes about my observations, what would I have to say about your children and about the way they are being raised? What information and inferences would I walk away with after an hour-long tour of your home? These are important questions to consider, especially if your […]
Read MoreNever text a tantrum or email your anger.
Posted September 25th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Too often, parents let their anger escape when they dispatch a nasty, visceral email or text message to their ex-husband or ex-wife, over a parenting issue. They snipe at each other on line: “I would prefer if you wouldn’t have that so-called girlfriend with you next time you pick up the kids.” “Why don’t you spend […]
Read MoreCome out of the dark ages. Start using an online custody calendar program.
Posted September 24th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
If you’re still marking up your calendar the old-fashioned way with custody and visitation dates, wake up. Times have changed! It’s time to come out of the dark ages and start using an online custody calendar program. Not every family will benefit from such a program, but many families can use online calendar and visitation […]
Read MoreDon’t move out too soon. It’s harder to fight for custody and visitation after you’ve left the house.
Posted September 23rd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Here’s a typical sequence of events: The marriage explodes in a final showdown. Father moves out. Mother stays behind in the marital home with the two children. When things settle down a week later, the parties exchange some emails and phone calls. Father wants to see the kids; Mother wants to see some financial support. […]
Read MoreHire a social worker as your private investigator, to ferret out valuable custody evidence.
Posted September 22nd, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
If your child custody case could benefit from the services of a private investigator, think about hiring a social worker instead. A licensed social worker can often double as a private eye while bringing valuable interviewing and observational skills to the task. Social workers usually do not charge unreasonable fees. While they don’t have the […]
Read MoreDocument drug and alcohol use by other parent both before and after breakup.
Posted September 21st, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Many divorces and custody cases these days are driven by alcohol and substance abuse issues. If your relationship has been defined or destroyed by excessive drinking or drug usage, then it will undoubtedly affect the nature of your child custody and parenting time case. Often, a parent’s substance abuse is so severe that he or […]
Read MoreJoin Up. Sign Up. Don’t just be a spectator at your kids’ concerts, tournaments and science fairs.
Posted September 20th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
It’s easy to say that you attended the school play in which your daughter had the starring role. Not too difficult to show up at your son’s soccer games. Pretty much a no-brainer to say you were present when the school band marched down your street on the Fourth-of-July Parade. It’s more difficult, however, to become […]
Read MoreHow to use signed statements to your advantage
Posted September 19th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
A parent walks into a family court with a file full of notarized statements from friends and family members. One statement reads: “He’s a great father, a hard worker and a diligent teacher.” Another says: “Bob should get custody, in my opinion, because he is a moral and spiritual man who loves and supports his […]
Read MoreStop and Think Before You Ask Your Children Who They Wish to Live With
Posted September 18th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
In determining who gets custody of the children, the wishes of the children are one of the most frequently cited factors. But how much weight should be given to the children’s preferences? Should the children’s vote be considered if they are under the continuous micro-management of their mother, or if they are consumed by the […]
Read MoreYour surprise witness is his FIRST ex-wife. Using earlier custody proceedings to your advantage
Posted September 17th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
If your opponent in a child custody case has been involved in a prior custody proceeding with another parent or ex-spouse, you may be sitting on a golden opportunity to win your case. Although there is often ill will between ex-spouses or former “significant others,” you may find that you have an ally out there, […]
Read MoreDon’t withhold visitation if he’s not paying child support
Posted September 16th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Judges and lawyers frequently find themselves dealing with motions in court because one party prohibited the other party from visiting the children because he failed to pay child support. The opposite is also true: We often hear about a party who refuses to pay child support because the custodial parent has refused to afford him […]
Read MoreDealing with Psychologists — Part 3: The Final Four Aspects of Your Child’s Behavior
Posted September 15th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
If your child is required to be interviewed by a psychologist or psychiatrist as part of a child custody evaluation, you should be aware of the factors the doctor will be considering during his interview. On Friday’s blog, we talked about four key factors, and on yesterday’s blog we examined four more factors. Today, we’ll […]
Read MoreDealing with Psychologists — Part 2: Four More Aspects of Your Child’s Behavior
Posted September 14th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
In addition to the four factors discussed in yesterday’s blog, psychologists and psychiatrists who perform custody evaluations will also be looking at your child’s thought process, sense of fantasy, self-concept, and super-ego functions. (This is Part 2 of a three-blog series. Be sure to check out yesterday’s blog and tomorrow’s blog for all 12 factors […]
Read MoreDealing with Psychologists – Part 1: Four Aspects of Your Child’s Behavior
Posted September 13th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
During the course of a child custody dispute, the family court may require the child and/or the parents to be examined or evaluated by a mental health expert — usually a psychologist or a psychiatrist. Psychologists are behavioral scientists who generally hold a Ph.D., Psy.D. or Ed.D. degree. Psychiatrists are physicians specializing in mental health […]
Read MoreFind out his “real” working schedule before agreeing to joint custody or visitation plan
Posted September 12th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
If you’re the custodial parent, you should invoke your rights to “pre-trial discovery” to find out your ex’s actual working schedule. Likewise, if you’re the non-custodial parent, you should use “discovery” techniques to find out about your ex’s true working patterns before you agree to custody, joint custody or visitation arrangements. Pre-trial discovery refers to […]
Read MoreHow to Handle Religious Issues Delicately
Posted September 11th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Occasionally, a child is pulled in two different directions by separated or divorced parents who follow different religious faiths. If this is the case, be sure to address religious activities delicately, not obsessively. In many states, the custodial parent controls the choice of religion. However, in many cases, the child may be exposed to several […]
Read MoreUse Stipulations as Shortcuts to Success in your custody case.
Posted September 10th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
A Stipulation is an agreement entered into by both parties in a child custody dispute which takes the form of a written document submitted to the Court. For example, two lawyers in a custody case might “stipulate” to extend the deadline for supplying documents to each other. They might stipulate to the date, time and […]
Read MoreHow to Use a Writ of Habeas Corpus in Your Custody Case
Posted September 9th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
When people hear the words “habeas corpus,” they usually think of some kind of legal action involving a prisoner who seeks to be released from detention. Yet a Writ of Habeas Corpus can be issued in a child custody case too, and in some states, it can be used to tremendous advantage for one party […]
Read MoreDo the math – Ask for travel expenses and gain leverage in negotiations.
Posted September 8th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
Parents often ignore the cost of a joint custody and timesharing arrangement until after the case has been mediated or after the court has signed an order. It’s often smarter, and more strategic, to do the math in advance of any mediation or court hearing. Figure out what it costs to transport the children between […]
Read MoreDon’t ignore your own health issues; Stay healthy to preserve your right to custody
Posted September 7th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
In virtually every state, the physical health of the parents is one of the factors which the court must consider before determining who gets custody of a child. A parent’s health is indeed an important consideration: A disabled parent may not be able to tend to a child’s needs or to assist in the event […]
Read MoreAvoid fawning and subservient witnesses
Posted September 6th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Custody Tips, Family Law.
One way to weaken your case in Family Court is to call witnesses who will say anything at all to help you. Whether it’s loving family members or good friends and neighbors, witnesses who gush forth with only flattering things to say can often come off as being blindly supportive and therefore of little evidentiary […]
Read MoreSeven Ways to Snag a Deadbeat Parent Who Won’t Pay Support for a Child
Posted August 25th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Divorce, Family Law.
When a deadbeat dad or a deadbeat mom refuses to pay child support, it’s typical for the other parent to file a motion in court asking the judge to enforce the support order. Sometimes it works; sometimes it doesn’t work. But there are actually at least 7 different get-tough maneuvers available to parents who are […]
Read MoreWhat is a Psychological Parent?
Posted August 20th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Family Law.
Is it possible for an adult who has no biological connection to a child to be granted custody? The answer is yes – if the adult is deemed a “psychological parent” of the child. A psychological parent can come into a child’s life in many ways, such as, for example, when a biological mother gives […]
Read MoreYour Right to Your Baby. Your Right to a Lawyer.
Posted July 30th, 2016.
Categories: Child Custody, Family Law.
The Supreme Court of New Jersey has again recognized the important constitutional right to appointed counsel in a parental termination case – this time in a case involving a contested private adoption. In The Matter of the Adoption of a Child by J.E.V. and D.G.V., decided July 26, 2016, Chief Justice Rabner, writing for a […]
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